Disciplinary Strategies

photo not mine

Do you agree to include spanking, hitting or slapping as a punishment for child misbehavior? Take the classes you need to learn effective parenting and appropriate disciplining

As parents we naturally inculcate discipline to help our young ones learn proper behavior and make good choices. Its primary importance is to teach them self-regulation to prepare them in facing the outside world.

In my opinion, physical punishment infuses fear and disobedience rather than understanding. In the old times, corporal penalty had been the primary form of disciplining kids, thus results to aggression, spanking leads a kid to be defiant and becomes more stubborn.

When I became a mom, I was able to manage and change the way on how I will discipline and raise my kids.  I do not want them to have whip marks on their skin as a form of castigation. It is best to formulate house rules to set limits and boundaries as I already mentioned in one of my previous post. We only need to establish a clear and consistent authority.

No matter how stubborn your kid is, you can manage to train him by setting an example, we need to bear in mind that we are the role model of our children. Listen to them as you expect them to listen to you. Teach them to develop listening skills and eye contact by using only the essential words, as much as possible refrain from saying annoying words that will put words into their mouth.

We also have to be aware that they can outsmart us at times, so be consistent and stick to the rules, when you say NO! you mean No. Sometimes you need to be hard and do exactly what you mean.  Establish mutual respect by explaining the rules and expect the consequences if they do not follow.

Time-outs will make your child realize and think about how he or she has behaved.

Withdrawal of privileges can be suggested but never take everything away from them.  Grounding for a week can do to let them grasp their mistake. This punishment is to get them understand not just that they did something wrong but also what motivated them to do it.

Physical punishment obstructs the bond between the parent and child, as it is not normal to hurt someone physically just to let them feel loved because it relays the opposite message in my understanding.

As they mature, we need to allow them to control over some things to give them more independence and responsibility at the same time it will teach them to deal with the consequences of their behavior. For instance, if they will not finish their school homeworks, they will suffer a bad grade when they go to school the next day.

Lastly, implementing an effective discipline will set up significant relationships which is crucial to an emotionally fulfilling life. It will also facilitate the kid to exercise self-control, accountability and mutual respect.


  1. thanks for sharing this, Ms. Joy.  I am really guilty of spanking and shouting struggling to change the way I discipline my children.  i know being a working mom  is not an excuse to losing my temper whenever they misbehave.   I think it's about time to prepare house rules. wish me luck, Mommy Joy! 

  2. it would be hard at first but practice makes perfect Wena. Good luck :)

  3. Spanking or hitting a child for misbehavior is not a healthy kind of disciplining a child. I remember the writings of a psychologist Lorna Nolte about the child grows the way he is treated. In school, as a school principal, we discourage or disallow our teachers to belittle their pupils, shout or whatever derogatory statement they haul to their pupils. Rather we advice to do it diplomatically, with love and care.

  4. i am guilty of this too... i mean spanking my little kid... but i still do believe that when we spare  the rod, we spoil the child. there is an intense debate on this, and i've seen so many successful people who have been disciplined the hard way when they were younger. i am really doing my best to not to spank anymore, i mean my 5 year old is already 5 year old and he can understand already. yeah, practice makes perfect and it's not going to be easy. thanks for this mommy Joy. paying a visit!

  5. With so many studies that have been made today regarding discipline I bet that violence is not needed anymore as a part. Violence will only result to more violence and that is the reality. How I wish that parents will release their kids from such primitive ways of parenting.


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